


Recognition

by mogwai_do



Series: Home is Where the Hearts are [2]
Category: Doctor Who, Doctor Who & Related Fandoms, Doctor Who (2005)
Genre: Alien Gender/Sexuality, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-01-06
Updated: 2013-01-06
Packaged: 2017-11-23 22:38:45
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,597
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/627293
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/mogwai_do/pseuds/mogwai_do
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Recognition - meeting again for the first time.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Recognition

Jack woke slowly to the soft clink of a mug and the light scent of tea. He blinked, unfocused for a moment until his vision resolved into the Doctor, the new Doctor, sitting on the edge of the TARDIS console and tugging hard at a boot, the other already lying discarded on the floor. A final tug and off it came and he looked up to see Jack's regard. A broad Doctor-ish grin lit his face - less manic than Jack remembered, but still recognisably the Doctor, so childishly pleased with the simplest of things.

"Tea?"

Jack nodded, he wasn't particularly keen on the drink, but his throat felt parched and his head ached with the beginnings of dehydration. The Doctor handed him the mug as Jack sat up and he took it, gulping gratefully, heedless of the temperature, just shy of too hot. Feeling more human Jack lowered the mug and met the Doctor's gaze a little sheepishly when he realised he'd drained the mug. The Doctor just smiled and waved it away. Jack watched, still silent, as the man stripped off the overlarge sweater, revealing a slightly less overlarge T-shirt. Jack raised an eyebrow, the Doctor raised one back.

"I can't do anything with the sleeves hanging off my hands."

"Fair point," it seemed a bit rude to ask and inviting an acerbic remark or at least it would have been before - who knew now - then again there was only one way to find out. "Isn't it... odd?"

A thoughtful look, but no misunderstanding his meaning. "You get used to it - there's always a settling in period, something that takes a bit more getting used to. Teeth - the teeth are very weird."

The whole concept was very weird to Jack, the idea of, well, metamorphosing into someone entirely different, not just in face and form, but personality too. As a survival tactic he admired it and from a conman's point of view it was ingenious, but still, it had to be strange to look into a mirror and not recognise yourself looking back.

"I'm still me," the voice was surprisingly soft and almost plaintive.

Jack blinked, "Rose not take it well?"

A mournful look that on this new face made Jack feel the most ridiculous surge of protectiveness. "Not after everything else, no." A brief, almost indignant look crossed the strangely familiar face, "I'm not dead."

Jack got to his feet, surprised he wasn't more shaky, "No, you're not," he confirmed. He'd been dead and the Doctor was far too... alive was really the only word for it. He stepped in closer and as every other time the Doctor failed to react to Jack's invasion of his personal space. "But she still doesn't know you," it was as much statement as question.

The Doctor's expression was a strange mixture of pique and sadness, but he didn't deny Jack's words.

Jack slid his hands onto the narrow hips, feeling the fabric bunch on the smaller frame; it felt like he could just shuck the man right out of the too big clothes. It was a tempting thought, but not the way it used to be. This Doctor was physically more attractive than his predecessor, almost pretty in a way that would give Jack a run for his money. But it hadn't been the man's looks that had attracted him to the Time Lord and he didn't know this new version well enough. He'd got used to the acerbic wit, the intellectual arrogance, the stony facade that covered the deepest of hurts; none of it had been able to hide how deeply the man had cared. It was frightening in a way to know that a person could change so completely you literally no longer recognised them.

Jack nudged closer, not sure if he was seeking comfort or offering it. Simple proximity was something he'd learned to appreciate in the aftermath of his nightmares and, to his surprise, something his companions had taken for exactly what it was, not ascribing any deeper motive or sexual intent. It was strangely comfortable with this new form, as if his body had already accepted what his brain was still having trouble with, and it was unsettling for that same reason.

The Doctor blinked and his eyes stayed closed for a long moment, aware of Jack's scrutiny and when they opened Jack felt his breath catch just a little. He'd always loved that moment with a new lover when he finally persuaded them to bare their bodies for him. It had never been the power of his persuasion that had turned him on, but rather the trust they gave him. In all those times though, never had anyone bared their soul to him like this. Jack was shocked; he hadn't even tried to persuade, he wouldn't have dared. The Doctor was intensely private and Jack couldn't imagine that it had ever or would ever change no matter what he looked like. That this was offered to him... took his breath away.

The intellect was still very much in evidence, but the arrogance had faded... somewhat anyway, he couldn't imagine it going completely. The acerbic wit had softened; where the other Doctor had been sharp and hard, he had been brittle too, fragile in some indefinable way. The hard shell had vanished, but when he looked closer it was still there, just sunk beneath the surface, covered with a veneer of affability. The constant hurt had disappeared too, but he thought he could see its faint shadows far back. The childish delight was still there, but gentler, preferring to laugh with rather than at. There was a softness to this Doctor, a gentle consideration that the other had rarely shown, but for all the amiable demeanour and the smaller physicality, Jack couldn't help but feel that this Doctor would be a tougher nut to crack. Impossible even, maybe, except...

"The body changes, the personality changes..." The Doctor nodded, silently. "But you're still you." He got it, he really did; a jigsaw was no less a jigsaw just because all the pieces had been mixed up. The Doctor still liked the things he'd liked, still hated the things he'd hated, it was only the expressions of it that changed. So even if Jack couldn't read it in this new face, this Doctor was still the same Doctor who had flirted with him and enjoyed it, who had accepted Jack's kiss the way it had been intended and if he needed proof of any of this he had only to remember who had come back for him.

He leaned forward with some vague half-formed notion that the Doctor would understand if Jack returned the kiss the Doctor had offered as proof of his identity, except this kiss was nothing like its predecessors. Slow yes, but chaste?

Jack felt it in his gut, slow deep heat uncoiling like a sunbathing snake, leisurely plundering, tongue curling, stroking deeply. God. His thoughts stuttered and stopped, his hands curled against body-warmed cotton and he felt his whole body tighten with want. Jack broke away with a gasp, for a moment unable to focus on anything beyond the haze of desire burning through his body. When he did though, the Doctor's eyes were glittering with pleased devilment, innocuous he may appear but it seemed this Doctor was anything but. It momentarily threw Jack off.

"Would you have done that before?" Jack asked, still breathless.

A slow blink, "Would you?"

It was Jack's turn to blink, struck by the truth of the question, and he had to stop and think. "I wanted to, but... for real?" It had been the subject of more than a few fantasies, but... "It would have hurt too much."

A raised eyebrow requested elaboration.

"He was too... vulnerable - he loved and he hurt for it, he couldn't help it no matter how much he wanted to." Jack would hate to cause that sort of pain, not in one of the very few friends he had ever had.

An unreadable smile, "You do realise it's still me you're talking to?"

Jack winced and blushed; it was easier to think of that Doctor as another person. He wondered if it hurt the man when it happened or if he understood that it was simply easier for a species that couldn't remake themselves so thoroughly.

"But thank you anyway," it was so softly spoken he almost missed it, but he blushed again at the warm look in the new eyes. It almost made him forget that the original question remained, almost.

"So why now?" He kept his voice low, but unsurprisingly it didn't get past the Time Lord.

"Persistent."

Jack smiled, "When it matters."

"You'll ruin your image."

Jack shrugged, "You never fell for it anyway."

A soft smile and gentle fingers trailed the edge of Jack's jaw; it was an odd gesture to see from someone who now looked younger than he did. "Near death experience?"

Jack felt his lips curve up, "Yours or mine?"

The Doctor laughed, a surprisingly joyful sound and Jack found himself joining in. It was infectious, the tension vanishing like smoke shredding on the breeze, and it didn't matter why only that it was. He wasn't sure how they made the transition, but suddenly they were kissing again and it was just as good as before - better because he could feel clever fingers working beneath his t-shirt, skating over skin that hadn't felt another's touch in an age. Jack groaned and it was swallowed whole; he pulled away with effort, surprised how quickly and thoroughly aroused he was.

There hadn't been any real sexual tension between them before, they'd been too comfortable for that, but there had been an... understanding. They could have tumbled into bed any time, but they hadn't - they'd been building it slowly he realised and he cherished it all the more for it.

Another kiss broke his train of thought and Jack felt himself pulled under a wave of desire. It felt so good to be wanted just for himself, because surely there was nothing else he could offer the Time Lord. He broke for air, for once agreeing with the Doctor - stupid apes couldn't hold their breath long enough. There was desire in the eyes that met his and... desperation?

It was like a bucket of ice water on Jack's libido. "Doctor?"

A flash of something like fear and then he was pulling away, leaving Jack bereft. Jack felt shaken and, for some ridiculous reason, guilty. A shuddery kind of breath and the Doctor perched himself on the edge of the console, arms wrapped tightly around himself. He looked ridiculously young and for a moment Jack felt a complete heel for ever entertaining lustful thoughts about the man. At a loss he stayed silent, waiting for the Doctor to speak.

A shaky sigh, "Sorry, I thought I was more settled than this."

Jack blinked dumbly, then the light dawned, "The regeneration?"

A nod, "I'd forgotten how..."

"Fucked up?"

"...it leaves me."

A wry smile at Jack's offered words, but no negation and Jack felt something in him twist painfully. He wasn't sure he could cope with a brush off at this point, his resiliency in the face of death, rebirth, abandonment and rescue was only skin deep. The Doctor's excuse, however true it might be, was right up there with 'I was drunk'; it smacked of regrets and things never done in a right mind. The tentative touch of a hand to his cheek brought his head up to meet strangely sorrowful eyes.

"After everything, I needed to know I was still... me." Jack frowned at the soft words and the Doctor's mouth twisted ruefully. "I needed to know I wasn't unrecognisable."

"And your people are gone." Jack finished softly, understanding finally why now. Aside from Rose and himself, the Doctor was all alone in the universe. Rose had rejected this new incarnation and he couldn't even recognise himself; the Doctor was adrift and needed someone to tie past and present together and that someone was Jack by chance and choice. Or would have been if he hadn't messed this up spectacularly.

Jack took a step forward, but the Doctor held up a hand warding him off.

"It's the wrong reason," he said by way of explanation and Jack felt something inside him curl up in sympathetic pain. He was old hands with the wrong reasons, even if they meant doing the right thing; the Doctor though was all about the right reasons and he lived with the consequences. In his recent travels Jack had begun to appreciate the right reasons, often harder to do, but easier to live with in the end.

Ignoring the Doctor's still-outstretched hand, Jack stepped in, wrapped his arms around the smaller man and pulled him close. The Doctor stiffened and held it so long Jack was almost ready to back off when he suddenly seemed to melt into Jack's embrace, face buried in the weapons vest Jack still hadn't taken off. On impulse Jack brushed a kiss against the Doctor's temple and felt the body in his arms stiffen once again.

"It's not wrong to want the comfort," he murmured, feeling foolish to be telling a Time Lord this, but in this at least he suspected he might have the greater knowledge. Certainly the Doctor's previous incarnation had understood emotion intellectually, but he'd had a hard time acting on it and he had Rose to thank for much of that. It was as if he feared one false move would loose a flood that would sweep them all away and so he'd held himself so tightly he'd been in danger of shattering. How this Doctor would react to it was a mystery, but he didn't reply and Jack pressed another kiss. "It's _not_ wrong to need it; it's only when the expectations differ that it's a problem."

Jack moved his hand, cupping the Doctor's chin and tipping his face up for a slow melting kiss. The Doctor didn't resist and it could have been Jack's admittedly overactive imagination in such matters, but the Time Lord seemed almost grateful that someone had dared, that someone _cared_.

As the Doctor finally responded Jack tightened his arms in some mixture of reassurance and comfort as much for himself as for the Doctor. They'd come from such different directions; Jack who had fucked without care, seeking that elusive connection and the Doctor who didn't fuck at all, but needed it no less, needed the depth of connection that only the physical could give. He wasn't sure which of them needed this more, this reminder of life and living, but he didn't suppose it mattered.

Jack tightened his grip and, with the ease of much practise, twisted them around so he could slowly back the Time Lord towards the chaise. The backs of the Doctor's knees hit the seat with a soft thump and he fell back just as Jack intended. To his surprise it startled a laugh from the Time Lord and Jack found himself grinning, if he'd known the man would be so amenable he'd have tried it before Satellite 5, then again, maybe earlier he wouldn't have been. A man could get very confused with this.

The Doctor gave a tug and Jack lost his balance, falling forward, but saving himself at the last moment with his hands either side of the Doctor's legs. He dropped to his knees and enjoyed the not-quite-human warmth of the Doctor's thighs where his forearms pressed against them. The Doctor's hands came up and cupped Jack's face before he leaned in for a teasing kiss, soft lips brushing his own with a ticklish gentleness that made Jack want to squirm with arousal. Jack broke away with a quickly indrawn breath and the Doctor smiled, "It's a good job Rose found you - you care too much to be a good con artist."

Jack couldn't decide whether to be amused, offended or flattered, he settled for seriously aroused when the Doctor leaned in again and this time he forewent the teasing for a simple, straightforward plundering. The hand down his pants startled Jack into a moan that the Doctor swallowed like he'd been starved. Slender fingers wrapped firmly around his cock, drawing Jack up from his knees, anything to keep that touch. A soft chuckle wafted against his lips, "You humans, so easily led around by your..."

No way was Jack going to let him get away with that one and he swarmed forward, pressing the slighter man back with his bodyweight and not-incidentally getting a lot of body to body contact. He didn't miss the way the Time Lord arched up into him or the way a second long-fingered hand joined the first and really these pants were far too tight for this.

Another breathless kiss later Jack met the Time Lord's eyes and gave a tentative thrust of his hips, getting a small squeeze in return. Then those clever hands slid away, gliding up over his belly, around his ribs, fingertips trailing down his spine. Jack shuddered and then with a grin the Doctor twisted somehow, the strength in the lithe body surprising and not just because he knew how to use it. Jack found himself on his back, one leg hanging half off the chaise, the Doctor's weight a comfortable pressure. Far from being put out, Jack found his hands free to explore and given the liberties the Doctor had already taken with his admittedly willing flesh, the Time Lord could hardly object when Jack slid his hands beneath the slack waistband to cup handfuls of a surprisingly firm ass.

Jack pressed down as he arched up, feeling the burn of arousal at the pressure of the Doctor's hip against his cock. The Doctor was laughing softly again, but Jack didn't mind - it gave the proceedings an interesting rhythm. A swift kiss and Jack was shocked when the Doctor suddenly slithered downwards until his legs slipped off the bottom of the chaise. Jack's desire-hazed brain barely had time to complain about the loss of that warm weight when it registered the nimble fingers working busily at his fly. He groaned in relief as the constriction on his cock eased; there was a pause just long enough for his brain to catch up with his dick and he raised his head just in time to see the Doctor's lips part and cover the head of his cock.

There was an audible thump as Jack's head dropped back. God - not that he believed in one, but he was open to persuasion - a slick tongue curled around his cock - very open. He had the urge to speak, but the sounds garbled in his throat and came out as a kind of strangulated grunt that set the Doctor laughing again, hot chuffs of air bathing his wet flesh. Jack's hands reached out blindly to find the shaggy chestnut hair he'd liked earlier; the Doctor didn't seem to mind Jack's clumsy attempts to guide him back down to business. He had time to briefly wonder how the Doctor could be so good at this, Jack was the lover here and he'd had more self-control his first time, and then coherent thought was lost. The universe was composed of a slick tongue, wet warmth, sharp teeth nipping teasing, strong throat sucking, swallowing... Jack was distantly aware of a humiliating number of whimpers escaping his throat and some truly obscene language, but the Doctor didn't seem to mind.

Held on that tortuously pleasurable brink, Jack didn't notice that his pants had been worked down his hips until he felt a spit-slick finger circle and press entrance. He cried out, silently sending out a mental apology as he rammed his cock down his friend's throat, completely unable to help himself. Under the twin stimulation there was no way he could hold on and the next time finger and cock both went deep Jack lost it entirely. He knew he was making an obscene amount of noise, that he was probably pulling out handfuls of hair and the Doctor might never speak again, but all he could care about was that the Doctor had done this, destroyed him, and he had never felt so... whole.

The next thing Jack knew, he was warm and quite impossibly comfortable.

"I had no idea you were such a cuddler." The voice came from the vicinity of his shoulder and Jack looked down to see the Doctor with Jack's arm wrapped around him as if he would never let go.

Nonplussed, Jack eased his grip, "I'm not."

Fortunately the Doctor said nothing by way of response to that; true as it had always been before it seemed the Doctor broke rules wherever he went and since Jack had long ago decided that some rules were meant to be broken, he decided he could probably live with the loss of this one. Still, a bit of shuffling and he'd moved far enough down that he was level with the Doctor's face. This kiss held a familiar tang and even though he'd more than witnessed it himself, Jack still couldn't help but be amazed.

"I had no idea."

The Doctor's lips quirked, "You'd be surprised."

Jack laughed softly, "I already am." Another light kiss and Jack drew back reluctantly. He'd been here before, this warm, easy place after sex, but never had it felt so comfortable nor had he wanted to leave it less. A hand snaked over the Doctor's hip and tugged him closer into full-body contact. Jack paused, it was hard to credit given their current comfort, but... "You didn't?"

The Doctor looked blank for a moment, then shrugged, "It's fine."

Jack wasn't sure how to take that - rejection or... what? "But..."

The Doctor cut him off with a quick headshake and retrieved Jack's wandering hand, pressing it to his chest, the odd double beat thrumming against his palm. "Not human remember."

Jack's brain took a second to process the implication, "You don't have..." his voice trailed off in something close to horror.

"Of course I have," mock offence reassured Jack and his hand went wandering again.

"I should check."

The Doctor snorted, but didn't stop him. Jack's hand encountered a substantial bulge and he paused, but it remained soft. He looked up and it felt like it had taken till now to really register the truth of the Doctor's words, even despite his transformation - he _was_ alien.

"But... I want to..." Jack couldn't believe how plaintive it sounded.

The Doctor smiled, "You of all people must have heard that 90% of seduction is in the mind."

Jack's mouth twisted, "Yeah, but..."

A sigh, "You're not going to let this go are you?"

Jack tried a pout, but the feeling behind it was too genuine. He really didn't like leaving it like this - he had a reputation for satisfied lovers, he had his pride and damn it, he _wanted_ to. A shift as the Doctor twisted onto his back and stared up at the ceiling; Jack waited. The Doctor had pegged it earlier - Jack could be _very_ persistent when it came to something he wanted.

"My people are... were never very numerous. We... Sex was for reproduction, not pleasure, and that only happened in cycles."

Jack considered this information, "Spock?" and laughed at the face the Doctor pulled.

"Rose been educating you then?"

Jack grinned, "Yup, there is no escape, you will be assimilated."

They shared a smile over their favourite blonde, then the Doctor twisted back to look at the ceiling again. Jack looked up to see what was so fascinating, but failed to do so and settled for watching the Doctor in profile, trying to etch this new face into his memory.

"Not Spock," the mobile lips for which Jack had a whole new appreciation shifted in a moue of disgusted resignation. "We just get a bit more..."

Jack grinned, "Horny?"

The Doctor's eyes flickered to his in annoyance and Jack knew he'd got it right. He turned onto his side and hooked a leg over the Doctor's pulling him a little closer. "So let me get this right - unless you're... on? In heat? You can't get it up? And I thought women could be difficult." The amused and outraged look the Doctor gave him was almost worth the disappointment. "This cycle? It's not seven years is it?" he couldn't quite keep the mournful tone from his voice.

The Doctor shook his head, obviously not trusting himself to speak in the face of such blatant provocation. Jack nudged himself closer still and let the teasing tone drop. "So what did you get out of this?" The Doctor looked at him and raised an eyebrow. "I need to know," Jack added seriously.

To his surprise the Doctor leaned in and gently kissed him, "I wasn't joking when I said seduction was in the mind - I did enjoy it too you know."

Jack frowned and the Doctor laughed, "You funny little humans, can't understand that not every species is all about the physical." Jack cut him off with a thorough tongue-lashing before the Time Lord could really get started on inferior species and was pleased to note the Doctor actually looked a little dazed when he finally came up for air.

Jack grinned, ridiculously triumphant; maybe the Doctor had forgotten that this little human was pretty well-travelled or maybe not, but Jack got it. Empathic, like the TARDIS, sensitive as he'd been in the hospital in London back when they'd first met - the Doctor literally got his pleasure out of giving pleasure to Jack. He suspected it was probably more complicated than that and there were other implications, but in essentials - it made sense. He'd try to pay more attention next time... if there was a next time. The uncommon pang he felt at the thought let him know just how much he wanted there to be a next time, preferably without the whole near death experience thing beforehand. He glanced over to see the Doctor watching him out of the corner of his eye and decided to let the subject drop - making the man uncomfortable was hardly his goal.

Jack tried for a reassuring smile and was relieved when the Doctor seemed to accept it. There was a drowsy look on the Time Lord's face that seemed normal enough after sex and seemed to corroborate his theory. He wasn't sure if it was his imagination or if the room really was getting dimmer. He glanced again at the Doctor and saw the closed eyes, though there was a tension in the body next to his that said the Time Lord was not quite asleep yet.

"Doctor?" Jack kept his voice low.

"Mmm?"

Jack shifted a little closer, finding the perfect configuration of limbs for a nice long nap. He tucked his chin into the crook of the Doctor's neck and shoulder and nuzzled a little, enjoying the sleepy response, suddenly realising what such simple actions might mean to the Time Lord, Jack's casual affection totally failing to disguise the genuine feeling beneath. "Will you let me know next time you're... ready?"

Dark eyes opened quickly, surprisingly sharp despite the haze of sleep. A twist and a languid hand cupped the back of Jack's head, pulling him into a sweetly drowsy kiss. Jack opened his eyes with effort to meet brown eyes that regarded him steadily for a moment before twinkling with mischief and a grin to match, "Maybe."

FIN


End file.
